25 Years and What Do You Get? was the 18th episode in Season 9 of Married... with Children, and was also the 201st overall. Directed by Sam W. Orender and written by Donald Beck, the episode originally aired on FOX, premiering on February 12, 1995.
Synopsis[]
In this episode, Buck buries the 25th wedding anniversary present that Al bought for Peggy in the backyard, and Al, Bud and Kelly spend hours digging in hopes of finding it. Marcy buys an all-day massage package for Peg as a gift and Peg spends all of Al's gift-money in the beauty shop. As both fail to get gifts, they pretend that they both forgot that its their anniversary.
Storyline[]
On their 25th wedding anniversary, Peggy goes out with Marcy to a posh health spa where Peggy gets coned out of all her money by a gift shop employee selling cheap beauty items. Meanwhile, Al is in trouble when the old and senile Buck buries in the back yard the anniversary gift necklace he plans to give Peggy, which prompts him, Bud and Kelly to literally dig up the entire back yard looking for the necklace.
Recurring Cast/Regulars[]
- Amanda Bearse as Marcy D'Arcy
- Ted McGinley as Jefferson D'Arcy
- Buck the Dog as Buck Bundy
Guest starring[]
- Marty Rackham as Dave
- John LeFleur as Sven (as John Robert LeFleur)
- David Drummond as Chance
Quotes[]
- Kelly: I don't want Buck to get old and senile.
- Al: Pumpkin, sweetheart, let me explain the aging process to you. I, too, was a young man.
- Bud: [quietly , annoyed] Ah, no.
- Al: Young enough to score four touchdowns in a single game. Then darkness cast her giant red shadow over the land. It was... [dramatic pause] "The Wife Age".
- Buck: And he thinks I'm getting old.
- Al: I never wanted children. I wanted to just work on car engines and make kissing sounds when women walked by me. The wife never shared my dream.
- [sometime later, after Buck struggles to find a bone and takes Al's gift from the couch cushion, Al continues on with his monologue, but now on the verge of having an emotional break down]
- Al: [pondering, gradually becoming more emotional] Twenty-five years?! How can that be?! I was just in high school! WHY?! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG! [begins to cry hysterically]
- [After finding out that the necklace he had bought for Peg is missing, Al becomes confrontational and accuses Bud and Kelly of stealing it]
- Al: Alright, let me explain something to you kids. If I don't get that necklace, then I can't give it to your mother. If I can't give it to your mother, [pauses] then I have to "give it" to your mother. And if I have to give it to your mother... I'm going to give it to you.[angrily points at Bud and Kelly]
- [Peggy is sitting at the gift shop counter with Dave]
- Dave: Okay, let's see what we've got: [holds up a small bottle] The "Margaret Chow chin wrap" [taps on his calculator, then picks up a paddle], the "Rosewood paddle fanny toner" and [picks up a small blue jar] the "Tommy Lee Jones crater spackle". [taps on his calculator] Which comes to... $300. But for you, Peggy I'm going to take off 15 percent. Then add 15 for gratuity, which brings us to Let's just round this off to $300.
- Peg: How do you people make any money?
- Chance: Mrs. Bundy, it's getting late. It's time for your Mexican pepper facial and spine pull.
- [Offscreen, Marcy is heard grunting as she is getting the same procedure for herself]
- Chance: [smiling, rubbing his hands] Very refreshing.
- Peg: [nervously chuckles] Hey, look. Here's 5 bucks. Go get yourself some pogs.
- Chance: [smiling] Gee, thanks, Mrs. Bundy! [runs off]
- [At the spa lobby, Sven brings Marcy over, who is now in a wheelchair and her head fully tilted to one side]
- Sven: She's done.
- Marcy: [stiffly] I feel so wonderful. So relaxed. So paralyzed.
- Sven: [kneels beside Marcy] You look 20 years younger.
- Marcy: Then I'll live with it. [smiles, then notices Peg walking over to her] Peggy, I can't lift my head any higher, but I'm sure you look fabulous. [sniffs] You certainly smell good.
- Peg: Oh, yeah. That must be my "Baby Ruth body balm".
- Marcy: Shall we go get Al's present?
- Peg: Can't. I spent all his money on stuff for me. Haha. But it's no big deal. Maybe if I don't mention it, he won't either. Let's go get dressed.
- Marcy: Oh, by the by, Sven. Will I be able to walk again?
- Sven: When you look this beautiful, the world will come to you.
- [Marcy and Peg let out a nervous chuckle as Sven takes his leave. Peggy then proceeds to push Marcy's wheelchair]
- Marcy: Am I smiling? I can't feel my face.
Notes[]
Title[]
- The episode title is a play on the lyrics, "You load sixteen tons, what do you get? Another day older and deeper in debt", from the song "Sixteen Tons" by Tennessee Ernie Ford as well as Al and Peggy celebrating 25 years of marriage.
- This episode shares a similar title origin with the season 1 episode, "Sixteen Years and What Do You Get?".
Trivia[]
- At one point, Al comes home with a jacket that reads "Farquhar's Formals" on the back. This is a nod to Ralph R. Farquhar, who has served as a writer, creative consultant and executive story editor for the series.
- Besides the title, the episode shares the same topic as the season 1 episode "Sixteen Years and What Do You Get?", in that Al and Peggy celebrate their wedding anniversary and they also try to get each other a special gift, but things do not go as planned.
- The scene where Al and Jefferson sneak in after the wives leave for the spa is the first time that shows the side door entrance in the laundry area being used in the show. Typically, it the sliding glass door next to the dryer that is used.
Cultural References[]
- Marcy boasted that she is taking Peggy to "Antoine's Under the El".
- The "L" (or "EL", as both mean "Elevated") refers to the Chicago rapid transit line, while saying "Under the L" may imply that it is located in a poor area.
- Al had previously mentioned that the family would have to sleep under the L in the season 2 "You Better Watch Out".
- Al mentions that for their anniversary, he bought her a diamond necklace. Technically, the traditional anniversary gift for 25 years of marriage is silver, while diamond is reserved for the 60th anniversary. Though it is possible that the necklace is made primarily of silver.
- Bud sees Al in a rented tuxedo whose legs are too short and asks: "Did it come with the matching Urkel glasses?", making a reference to Steve Urkel from the ABC sitcom Family Matters, and that character’s typical nerdy fashion.
- After showing off what he was able to buy after getting a cheap tuxedo, Bud comments on the "Hairy Abba-Zaba". Abba-Zaba is a brand of candy made from taffy with a peanut butter center.
- Al mentions that he will be taking Peggy to the family restaurant/diner Denny's for their anniversary.
- Al also mentions that he will be giving Peggy a "NyQuil Mickey" slipped into her piña colada, so he can have the rest of the night to himself and watch midget wrestling.
- A "Mickey" (short for "Mickey Finn") refers to a drink that has been laced with either a psychoactive or incapacitating drug and given to an unsuspecting person.
- In this case, Al mentions that he will be mixing it with NyQuil, which is the name brand of a nighttime cold and cough medicine with ingredients that can make people drowsy and fall asleep faster.
- Midget wrestling was mentioned in season 1's "Sixteen Years and What Do You Get", part of the original plan for the anniversary evening when Peggy tells Steve and Marcy of their plans in that episode.
- After Al mentions that Buck is getting old and will eventually die, Jefferson comforts Kelly while sarcastically calling Al "Father Teresa".
- This is in reference to Mother Teresa, a catholic nun who was known for her charity work that helped the poor and sick.
- Several products that Dave sells to Peggy are named after celebrities and food products:
- Margaret Cho Chin Wrap
- Tommy Lee Jones Crater Spackle
- Famous Amos Facial Disks
- Baby Ruth Body Balm
- Peggy gives Chance $5 dollars and tells him to go buy himself some Pogs.
- Pogs is the commercialized name used for a children's game originally known as "Milk Caps" that originated in Hawaii. At the time this episode was filmed, there was a big craze for Pogs among children in the mainland U.S., but it eventually faded out of popularity by the late 1990s.
Locations[]
- Bundy Residence
- Antoine's Under The EL
Sets[]
- Bundy Living Room / Kitchen
- Bundy Backyard
- Antoine's Under The El Waiting Area / Gift Shop
Goofs[]
- Although it is supposed to be their 25th wedding anniversary in this episode, this would contradict the season 6 episode, "My Dinner with Anthrax", where they claimed it is their 20th anniversary. That episode takes place in 1992, three years before this episode was filmed. It would also contradict the season 1 episode, "Sixteen Years and What Do You Get?" which took place in 1987.
- For them to celebrate their 25th anniversary in 1995, that would mean that they married in 1970, but "Sixteen Years and What Do You Get" showed that they married in 1971 and "My Dinner with Anthrax" would have meant that they married in 1972.
- Katey Sagal's real hair starts to peek out from the Peggy bouffant wig during the spa scenes.
- When Al and Jefferson are shown entering from the side entrance door in the laundry room, the door is not fully closed. When it cuts to Al comparing their wives leaving to a hemiroid coming back with a vengeance, the door is now shut.