Crimes Against Obesity

Crimes Against Obesity is the 9th episode of season 11 of Married... with Children and the 244th overall series episode. Directed by Amanda Bearse and written by Russell Marcus, it premiered on FOX-TV on December 29, 1996.

Synopsis

On his birthday, when Al insults fat women on the way to the Jiggly Room, he is put on trial in the shoe store by a group of fat women who accuse him of being prejudiced against the obese. Meanwhile, Bud and Kelly attempt to tint the Dodge's windows as a birthday present to Al. Peggy bakes him a cake and eats it.

Plot Summary

Today is Al's birthday and he goes over his cardinal rules with his family: his kids, Kelly and Bud, are to leave him alone and Peggy isn't allowed to have sex with him. This is followed by his kids putting up tinted sheets on his dodge. He goes to work with Jefferson after having a great breakfast at the Jiggly Room courtesy of a birthday coupon. Griff presents him a lunchtime coupon at the Jiggly Room, and the three head out. As they are about to leave, a fat woman named Shirley walks in and demands her money back because her shoes fell apart after one day. Al insults her weight once again, calling her a giant seal. She leaves insulted and he heads off to the Jiggly room. After Al returns, Shirley and the fat women he insulted over the years who have patronized Gary's, put him on trial for excessive crimes against obesity, with his insults to their weight. Can he survive long enough against them to use his coupons to places he wants to go and use them? Or will Al be force to endure their punishment they plan for him?

Peggy eventually shows up at the shoe store looking for Al who excitedly calls her up to the stand to defend him. However, she blabs about Al's dislike of plus size women until one of the women tears up another of Al's coupons, causing her to snap and insult them as well. Al is found guilty of his crimes and is about to be given a lapdance by the woman serving as a bodyguard until he breaks down. Al lies to the women and claims that he was once overweight himself as a teenager, being insulted and bullied by his own parents because of it; that is why he takes it out on the women. Moved, the judge clears all charges and plans to announce that Gary's is a store friendly to the obese. As the women leave, Al reveals his demeanor hasn't changed as he shouts another insult, locks the door, and makes love to Peg in the shoe store.

Meanwhile, Kelly accidentally puts the tinted sheet on Bud's face, not realizing the window had to be up first. After failed attempts to remove the tint, Kelly knocks out a panicked Bud with a hammer and accidentally breaks Al's window. She also panics until she decides to frame Bud by putting the hammer in his hand. 

Back at home, Al smiles and says he has had a good birthday, grateful that his children tinted the car. It's revealed that Bud stole a window from Marcy's Mercedes, replacing it on Al's car before he got home. Al is touched by the gift - until he sits down on the broken glass in his car.

Recurring Cast/Regulars

• Harold Sylvester as Griff

Guest Stars

• Diana Bellamy as Nancy
• Cassi Davis as Patty
• Danica Sheridan as Matilda
• Jennifer Echols as Gwen
• Helen Siff as Leonna
• Kelly Goodman as Barbara
• Nicole Nagorsky as Penelope
• Winfried Freedman as Enid (uncredited; archive footage)
• Hill Harper as Aaron Mitchell (uncredited; archive footage)

Notes

Title

• The episode title is inspired by the legal expression "Crimes Against Humanity" and the medical condition, Obesity.

Trivia

• Marcy does not appear in this episode, although the character is heard off-screen.
• Nancy, the first fat woman customer in the episode, was the first fat woman customer in the entire series.
• Several clips from past episodes of MWC are shown when Matilda takes the stand and later when Al tries to convince the women he doesn't say mean things all the time:
  • "A Shoe Room with a View" - Matilda recounts the time that she went to Gary's and Al insulted her. After mentioning that her feet might have gotten bigger from all the aerobics she has been doing at Gary's Aerobics Studio, he suggests that she might have also fallen on her butt a few times as well. As she gets up and says how dare he say that to her face, he replies "Well, I'd say it behind your back, but my car's only got half a tank of gas!".
  • "Honey, I Blew Up Myself" - After Enid says that she doesn't like the shade of blue on the shoe Al struggled to put on her foot, he then suggest that he puts her in front of a mirror and strangles her until she reaches the particular shade of blue that she likes.
  • "Nooner or Later" - As Penelope insults Al for getting the wrong shade of pink, he tells her "A thousand pardons, my little carbuncle". She then reminds Al that with his attitude, he'll be working there for the rest of his life. He tells her to look next to her, where her mother, Leonna, is seating and tells her that'll be her future.
  • "Nooner or Later" - Al and Dexter attempt to put shoes on Barbara. Al then asks Dexter to grab a tranquilizer gun to tag and release her.
  • "Pilot" - Al insults Nancy as her son Arnold demands to have a balloon and points out that he already has one with his mom.
• This is one of the few episodes where the fourth wall is broken. In this case, Al breaks the fourth wall by looking directly into the camera and saying "And I'm on trial?!" after Gwen reveals that she lost an entire kindergarten class due to her hunger.

Cultural References

• Peggy mentions the oven cleaning product, Easy-Off, as something she used to clean Kelly's nursery.
• Al mentions that one of his birthday coupons is for the diner style restaurant chain, IHOP.
• Peggy reveals that Al liked "that big mom from 'What's Happening!!' ", referring to the 1970s sitcom and the character, Mabel "Mama" Thomas.

Music

• Al sings a variation of the song "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow" called "For I'm a Jolly Good Fellow".

Locations

• Bundy Residence
• Gary's Shoes & Accessories for Today's Woman

Sets

• Bundy Living Room / Kitchen
• Bundy Garage
• Gary's Shoes Seating Area / Register

Goofs

• After Kelly knocks Bud unconscious and props him against the Dodge, she puts the hammer in his hand. Despite being unconscious, Bud clearly grabs the hammer that Kelly tries to put into his hand.