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B.A.D. (Bald American Dudes), is a group of bald men who deluded themselves into believing bald is sexy and sophisticated. It is seen in the Season 3 episode, "The Bald and the Beautiful".

Description[]

The group consist of men who appear to be between their early 40s to early 60s who are either balding or completely bald. The group members address each other as "Brother". The group's purpose is to spread the message that men going bald should be accepted by society and that there many benefits to being bald, such as being more intelligent, sophisticated, and desirable to women.

History[]

After several attempts to slow down their balding, Al and Steve almost join B.A.D., as they feared going bald. The group uses Gary's Shoes & Accessories for Today's Woman to host their meeting and bring Al and Steve in, blindfolded. They are first introduced by Murray, who starts the meeting. Later, Lance takes over, informing the group about another member, Brother Herbert, suffering an accident after a child aimed a reflector near his bald head, and likely causing severe sunburns.

Lance then goes into the topic of the night, "Hair: How Can We Stop It?", discussing why hair isn't important in today's society. He notes that while hair was important during the pre-historic days, the bald are truly an evolved form of man and that baldness means a man is more intelligent, sophisticated, and virile. He finishes his talk by telling the group that the next time a hairy child comes up and asks to rub his bald head for good luck, they can respond with "That's not what your mother rubbed!".

Steve decides to introduce himself and eventually cries as he realizes that the group has given him strength to accept his baldness, with the group cheer him on. Lance reminds the group that bald men are sexier and more aerodynamic, telling them "A bald head says good in bed!". He then asks Al to introduce himself.

Al stands up and tells the guys that they are nuts for believing that they are sexier and more desirable to women. He then points out that decided that these guys make him think two things: One, he really missed playing pool, and Two, neither he nor Steve are bald like the rest of the members are. He adds that if he does ever reach the level of baldness that the members are at, he will still never join them because he will always have that one special person who will love him no matter what, his couch.

Members[]

  • Murray
  • Lance
  • Herbert (mentioned only)
  • Several unnamed bald men
  • Steve
  • Al

Gallery[]

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