I Can't Believe It's Butter is the fourteenth episode of Season 10, and the 225th overall episode of Married... with Children. Directed by Sam W. Orender and co-written by Scott Zimbler and Joel Valentincic, the episode originally aired on FOX on December 13, 1995.
Summary[]
During the Christmas season, Griff becomes quite fond of a phone sex partner named "Butter," whom Al discovers is really Peg's mother. Although the new job is allowing her to pay for the Bundys' Christmas, things go bad when Griff admits to Al that he wants to ask Butter out.
Plot[]
Griff, a little depressed this holiday season
A few days before Christmas, the members of NO MA'AM gather at Gary's Shoes to have a holiday party. After seeing Griff getting depressed over the last few weeks, Al reveals that he got him a 20 minute gift card to at a phone sex line called "1-900-YUMMY". which he hopes will help soothe his loneliness.
As Al and the rest of NO MA'AM convince Griff to use gift card during the party, the group gather around the phone and introduce themselves to a woman named "Butter". As the holiday gets closer, Griff begins to call Butter more often, but Al soon finds out that Butter is in fact Peg's mother. Although he is initially horrified, after seeing that she is now contributing to the Bundy residence with the money she earns, and even buying the family a nice Christmas dinner, Al decides to keep this a secret from Griff and the rest of NO MA'AM,
The plan soon backfires when Griff falls in love with her. Al makes a plan. He gets Bud and Kelly to get Peggy's mother to leave the room so Peggy and Al can use the phone. Peggy acts as Butter, and she tells Griff that while they may have had enjoyable experiences of phone sex, they can't spend the holidays together as she already has "someone special". Griff comes out of it relatively fine, which pleases Al.
A few moments later, the rest of NO MA'AM meet at the Bundy residence and plan to celebrate Christmas at the Nudie Bar. Unfortunately, Peggy's mother notices the commotion and appears in front of the group. She proceeds to tell them that she recognizes their voices and says their secret names from the hotline, as she reveals to them that she is Butter. The group is left aghast in horror and attempt to run outside, with Al giving her a dirty look as the episode ends.
Recurring Cast[]
- Harold Sylvester as Griff
- E.E. Bell as Bob Rooney
- Tom McCleister as Ike
- Dan Tullis, Jr. as Officer Dan
- Kathleen Freeman as Peg's Mom
Guest Cast[]
- Danica Sheridan as Belinda
- Venessia Valentino as Cindy
- Dijon Williams as Bobby
- Jennifer Martin as Butter
Quotes[]
- [At the Bundy kitchen table, Al tells the family that he is planning to use whatever money is in the Bundy Christmas Club account for presents, but the rest of the family is not enthusiastic.]
- Bud: [frustrated] Dad, why do we go through this pathetic charade every year? You know darn well Mom's jimmied the lock and spent all the money on herself.
- Peg: [defensive] I didn't spend one penny on myself this year.
- [Bud and Kelly suddenly perk up]
- Bud: Hey, maybe, we will get some presents.
- [Their joy immediately disappears as Al reveals that there is nothing but receipts in the sock that he was keeping the money in]
- Al: Then why is there nothing but receipts in here, Peg?
- Peg: Well, those aren't from me. That's just stuff Mom needed.
- Al: [looking at each receipt] Five hundred dollars for JJ's House of Strudel. Two hundred dollars for a heavy-duty Buttmaster.
- Peg: Everybody knows that strudel goes straight to the butt.
- Al: [in a defeated tone] Well, there goes your Christmas gift, Peg.
- Kelly: [concerned] What about us?
- Al: Oh, this doesn't affect your gift, pumpkin.
- [As Kelly smiles and becomes excited, Al stands up and extends his right hand out to shake her hand, instantly wiping away any joy that she had]
- Al: [awkwardly shaking Kelly's hand] Merry Christmas.
- [Al then turns to Bud and extends his hand out for another handshake. Bud just gives him a dirty look instead]
- Al: [with his hand still extended out] Merry Christmas. [immediately becomes angry and threatens to slap Bud with the back of his hand] I ought to give you one of these for Christmas!
- [After some thought, Griff decides to call Butter and ask her out on a date. On the other end, Peggy is pretending to be Butter, while Al tries to coach her into letting Griff down gently]
- Griff: Hey, Butter, I got to ask you this before I lose the nerve. Will you come spend the holidays with me?
- Peg: Oh, well, I'd love to, Mr. O' Plenty but it's against company policy. You see, we phone-sex employees live by the highest moral and ethical standards.
- Griff: Yeah, well, I'd make it a Christmas you'd never forget. Dinner. Dancing. A sleigh ride to the airport Motel 6 where I would rock your world.
- [Peggy is now shown biting down and twirling the phone cord, indicating that she is turned on and interested, while Al stands over her, giving her an odd look]
- Peg: [after a moment, smiling] I'll be there in a half an hour. [turns to Al, in her normal voice] Al, I'm leaving you.
- Al: Peg, under normal circumstances, I'd help you pack. But there's more at stake here than our marriage, Peg, there's money. Piles and piles of money. I want you to get back on that phone and do what you do best: Shatter dreams.
- Peg: Look, Horn, I've got to be perfectly honest with you. You see, I'm a happily married woman with children. Very, very young children. Infants.
- Griff: Hey, I don't mind messing around with a married woman.
- Peg: [pauses, then turns to Al] Al, I'll be back by New Year's.
- Al: Peg, he's a shoe salesman. It would be like leaving me for me.
- Peg: Oh, yeah. Thanks for talking me down, Al.
- [After Al helps Griff accept that it is time to move on from Butter, the other members of NO MA'AM arrive at the Bundy residence]
- Jefferson: Hey guys, since our wives are downtown feeding Christmas dinners for the homeless, shouldn't we be at the nudie bar feeding dollars to the topless?
- [the guys cheer, with Jefferson and Bob Rooney playfully jabbing each other]
- Al: Great idea. To the nudie bar.
- [the guys cheer]
- Bob Rooney: Where Christmas is nice...
- Al: [smiling] And lap dances are half-price.
- NO MA'AM: At the nudie bar!
- Ike: Where you drink down the shooters...
- Officer Dan: [leans in next to Ike] And unwrap the hooters.
- NO MA'AM: At the nudie bar!
- Jefferson: Where eggnog's a plenty...
- Griff: And the girls are all 20.
- NO MA'AM: At the nudie bar!
Notes[]
Title[]
- The title of the episode is a reference to the butter substitute spread, I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!.
Trivia[]
- At the beginning of the episode, Al mentions that the family has a Christmas Club account hidden in one of his socks so he could save up money and buy the family presents. He previously had a Christmas Club account with Kyoto National Bank in the season 4 episode, "It's a Bundyful Life (Part 1)".
- A "Christmas Club" is an actual type of short-term savings account, in which someone puts aside money each week for Christmas spending and receive a check shortly before Christmas. It fell out of favor with customers over the years as it typically had an interest rate that was very low compared to a typical savings account and numerous restrictions made it difficult to maintain year after year.
- The nicknames that the guys use when talking to Butter are:
- Al - Double O Shoe
- Griff - Shoehorn O' Plenty
- Ike - Hot Pants
- Officer Dan - Psycho Cop
- Bob Rooney - Butcher Boy
- Jefferson - Ken Doll
- These nicknames are similar to the ones used in the Woody Woodpecker short "A Fine Feathered Frenzy." They include Dream Boy, Cutie Pie, and Honey Lamb.
- This episode marks the final appearance of Kathleen Freeman as the voice of Peggy's mom.
Cultural References[]
- When Al tells Peggy to imagine that she is with someone else like they do with sex, she calls him "Fabio" and he calls her "Ginger...and Mary-Ann".
- Fabio is an Italian-born model and spokesperson who at the time of this episode’s original airing, was known for being a spokesperson for I Can't Believe It’s Not Butter and appearing on the cover of various romance novels. He was previously mentioned during the Five Demands in season 8's "NO MA'AM".
- Ginger and Mary Ann are references to two of the principal female characters from the television sitcom Gilligan's Island. Tina Louise, who played Ginger, had previously guest starred on MWC as Miss Beck in Season 5’s "Kelly Bounces Back".
- Marcy tells Jefferson that she got him a job playing a life-size Ken doll in the Barbie Christmas window at Marshall Fields.
- Marshall Field's was a department store founded in Chicago during the 19th century. It was in operation until being acquired by the retail chain Macy's in 2006.
- Ken is a toy doll that is the boyfriend of Barbie, which were previously mentioned in "Guys and Dolls" and "Sleepless in Chicago".
- After Griff upsets the mother of the young child, Bobby, she tells her son that "...the real Santa is at Kmart!".
- Kmart is a big box retailer that is headquartered just outside of Chicago, Illinois. At the time this episode aired, the retailer was a successful chain that had stores across the U.S. and several other countries. As of 2021, only a very small but unknown number of stores still operate within the U.S. while KMart Australia still has 200 stores in operation.
- The chain was previously mentioned in "Reverend Al".
- Al's nickname, "Double O Shoe", is a reference to the fictional secret agent, James Bond and his code name, "007" (pronounced "Double-Oh-Seven").
- Al had previously used this nickname as his code name while covertly talking with Jefferson and Bud in "Dud Bowl II".
- Griff revealed that one of the things his ex-wife took in the divorce was his collection of films featuring Pam Grier, an actress who was best known for her roles in Blaxploitation and Women in Prison films during the 1970s.
- After Peggy realizes that the family will have to live on Al's income again if Griff finds out about Butter's true identity, Kelly becomes upsets and says "I hate him! He's the Griff who stole Christmas!". This is in reference to the children's book, How the Grinch Stole Christmas!.
- This short makes many references to the Woody Woodpecker short "A Fine Feathered Frenzy." The plot involves Woody/Griff becoming smitten with an overweight person. The unseen woman's voice is similar in this episode and the Woody Woodpecker short. There is even a feast which the Bundys enjoy for a bit as does Woody in the earlier short. The only differences are that the reveal is earlier in the short while this episode sees the reveal happen toward the end with Al and his NO MA'AM friends planning a trip to the nudie bar as Butter/Peg's Mom hears the voices of her phone friends. There is also a scene where Peggy tries to convince Griff that he can't meet Butter.
Music[]
- The traditionally Christmas song, "Deck The Halls" is heard thrice: first, when Ike hums the melody of it while at the shoe store, then an instrumental version is played when the Bundys are having a meal together on Christmas eve and finally the NO MA'AM members sing the opening line as they arrive at the Bundy residence near the end of the episode.
Locations[]
Sets[]
- Bundy Living Room / Kitchen
- Gary's Shoes Entrance / Cash Register
Goofs[]
- After talking to Al about taking Butter out and saying he trusts his judgment, Griff takes a glass that's supposed to have gravy in it - but you can clearly see that the glass is empty.
- After Griff leaves the Bundy house, Al calls the sex line to talk to Butter, who is upstairs. The upstairs phone rings and has an older style "bell chime" ringtone. Later in the episode when Griff calls Butter from the Bundy living room, Peg is upstairs pretending to be Butter, but her ring tone is now electric.
- When Griff rings the Bundy doorbell, Al quickly wraps up the entire family meal in the table cloth and puts it in the closet. When Al runs back to the table, there is a dinner roll near Bud. The roll stays on the table when Bud and Kelly get up and Al sits down. After Peg whispers something dirty into his ear, the roll completely disappears again.
- After Al comes back to the table, Peg's bib can be seen falling from her lap. After Kelly puts down her dinner bib on the table and calls Griff "The Griff who Stole Christmas!", Bud tosses his down afterward near his spot on the table. When Al sits down and tells his plan to Peg, she now has a neatly placed flat bib in front of her. After she's talks dirty in Al's ear and the camera moves back, Bud's bib moves back to his spot, Kelly's is folded differently, and Peg's is now rolled up.
- When Al and Griff are taking shots of gravy, there is a can that is at an angle and touching the edge of the "DREAM" magazine under the phone. When then camera widens as Al heads upstairs, the can is now straight and not touching the magazine.