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|Right, and the check is in my mouth. |
|Right, and the check is in my mouth. |
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− | |The check is in the mail |
+ | |The check is in the mail. |
|[[Episode:Nooner or Later|8x21]] |
|[[Episode:Nooner or Later|8x21]] |
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|[[Episode:What Goes Around Comes Around|4x18]] |
|[[Episode:What Goes Around Comes Around|4x18]] |
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− | |The quest for the holy |
+ | |The quest for the holy pail. |
|The quest for the holy grail. |
|The quest for the holy grail. |
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|[[Episode:Kelly Doesn't Live Here Anymore|7x08]] |
|[[Episode:Kelly Doesn't Live Here Anymore|7x08]] |
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|[[Episode:Here's Lookin' at You, Kid|3x22]] |
|[[Episode:Here's Lookin' at You, Kid|3x22]] |
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− | |There, |
+ | |There, before the flippers, go I. |
− | |There, |
+ | |There, before the grace of God, go I. |
|[[Episode:At the Zoo|4x10]] |
|[[Episode:At the Zoo|4x10]] |
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Revision as of 18:54, 23 March 2018
Kellyisms are the malapropisms that are spoken by Kelly Bundy when attempting to use popular sayings, such as mottos, mantras or proverbs. However, because of her poor education and comprehension, these often are misquoted, either by a single word or entirely. It should be noted that sometimes, even when using a malapropism, Kelly still manages to get the point across, if not easily, while other times, it's just awkward and silly.
Expressions
What Kelly Said | What Kelly Means | Episode |
---|---|---|
ABD | ABC | 5x19 |
Adidas | Adios | 5x10, 10x12 |
Aquarium | Aquarius | 4x19 |
Bras | Brows | 7x15 |
Brazil | Mentioned as a US State | 6x15 |
Bulgaria | Mentioned as a disease | 4x11 |
Buttshell | Nutshell | 9x17 |
Chinese Waiter Torture | Chinese Water Torture | 7x21 |
Coinkidink | Coincidence | 7x02, 7x08 |
Coronary-copia | Cornucopia | 9x12 |
Coyote | Kyoto | 10x10 |
Da-ta | Ta-da | 11x09 |
Dances with Wool | Dances with Wolves | TOTH: 1x03 |
Donald and Daffy Ducci | Donald and Daffy Duck, mixed with Verducci | TOTH: 1x05 |
East Dakota | North/South Dakota | 4x21 |
Electrical | Electoral | 7x07 |
Felines | Females | 9x26 |
Fox paws | Faux pas | 6x23 |
Francis Ford Coppertop | Francis Ford Coppola | 9x23 |
Grey Mattress | Grey Matter | 8x18 |
G-Spot | Ten Spot | 3x21 |
Hunchback | Hunch | 5x24 |
Illegitimate | Illiterate | 4x20 |
Illiteral | Illiterate | 7x08 |
Indonesia | Amnesia | 11x10 |
Inseminations | Insinuations | 5x10 |
Intersections | Interjections | 6x10 |
Jolly Goodfellas | Goodfellas | 10x15 |
Lesbian | Thespian | 9x20 |
Long Island | Los Angeles | 5x23 |
Los Angeles, the Big Apple | New York City is known as the Big Apple | 6x10 |
Magnesia | Amnesia | 7x17 |
Mental pause | Menopause | 7x19 |
Metamucil | Metaphoric | 7x08 |
Ministers | Minerals | 6x17 |
Mistress | Master | 5x10 |
Monte Cristo's revenge | Montezuma's revenge | 5x02 |
North and South Georgia | Mentioned as US States; Georgia (single state) | 6x15 |
Norwegia | Norway | 8x03 |
Optometrist | Optimist | 7x17 |
Ping and pong | Ying and yang | 10x25 |
Poke High | Polk High | 3x03 |
Probation | Prostation | 5x23 |
Proctology | Ecology | 10x07 |
Reincarcerated | Reincarnated | 10x25 |
Rocks | Minerals | 4x02 |
Spinach | Spanish | 10x21 |
Stereo system | Stereotype | 9x08 |
Street Louis | Saint Louis | 9x11 |
Terminus | Terminal | 4x11 |
Testicle | Testica | 11x05 |
Topeka! | Eureka! | 5x06 |
Unconscious | Confucius | 9x26 |
Urethra! | Eureka! | 5x06 |
Vale-dictator | Valedictorian | 10x08 |
Vegetarian | Veterinarian | 8x25 |
Viola | Voilà | 3x18 |
Wallabie | Wannabe | 6x20 |
Statements
What Kelly Said | What Kelly Means | Episode |
---|---|---|
As inevitable as death in Texas. | As inevitable as death and taxes. | 4x16 |
Buenos Nachos. |
Buenas Noches. | 5x11 |
B-U-N-D and sometimes Y. | Combination of the spelling of Bundy and English vowels "A-E-I-O-U and sometimes Y". | 9x18 |
Comme ci, comme di. | Comme ci, comme ça. | 9x12 |
Down yours. | Up yours. | 10x15 |
Fly like the beagle. | Fly like an eagle. | 7x15 |
I'm going to hold my breast until I turn blue. | I'm going to hold my breath until I turn blue. | 8x25 |
I'm on the edge of my feet. | I'm on the edge of my seat. | 9x26 |
I'm on the horns of an enema. | I'm on the horns of a dilemma. | 4x21 |
I think something's rotten in the state of Denver. | Something is rotten in the state of Denmark. (Shakespeare) | 4x12 |
I wear my heart on my sleaze. | I wear my heart on my sleeve. | 7x21 |
Is a bear catholic? | Is the Pope a Catholic?/Does a bear shit in the woods? | 9x14 |
It's as easy as 1, 2, C. | It's as easy as 1, 2, 3. | 4x22 |
It's so hot you could lay an egg on the sidewalk. | It's so hot you could fry an egg on the sidewalk. | 5x24 |
Mars to Mom. | Earth to Mom. | 11x03 |
My brain beats faster. | My heart beats faster. | 5x19 |
Objection stained. | Objection sustained. | 7x20 |
Quoth the Raven 'Demi Moore'. | Quoth the Raven 'Nevermore'. | 7x16 |
Right, and the check is in my mouth. | The check is in the mail. | 8x21 |
Squid pro quo. | Quid pro quo. | 9x13 |
Strip-search me. | Search me. | 6x04 |
That is the squaw that stroke the camel's sack. | That is the straw that broke the camel's back. | 9x01 |
The defense breasts. | The defense rests. | 7x20 |
The mind wobbles. | The mind boggles. | 6x09 |
The prostitution rests. | The prosecution rests. | 4x18 |
The quest for the holy pail. | The quest for the holy grail. | 7x08 |
Three out of two. | Two out of three. | 11x24 |
You could've knocked me over with the weather. | You could've knocked me over with a feather. | 6x14 |
Your words fall off me like water of a duck's quack. | Your words fall off me like water of a duck's back. | 5x17 |
Wisdom
What Kelly Said | What Kelly Means | Episode |
---|---|---|
As Shakespeare said, the plate's the thing. | The play's the thing, wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king. | 7x08 |
Case of rum, case of rum. | Que sera, sera (Whatever will be) | 5x13 |
E before O except before E-I-E-I-O. | A mixture of I before E except after C and the song Old MacDonald had a Farm, E-I-E-I-O as an explanation for the spelling of Sheos. | 9x23 |
Feet are cold, starve for pizza./
Starve a pizza, eat cold feet. |
Feed a cold, starve a fever. | 5x02 |
He who laughs last, laughs west. | He who laughs last laughs best. | 6x20 |
It's better to have loved and lost than never to have seen 'Lost in Space' at all. | It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. | 9x26 |
It turns, therefore I am. | I think, therefore I am. | 6x20 |
Make new thoughts, but keep the old, one is silver and the other is old. | Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold. | 6x20 |
Mom and Dad are my relatives, therefore I am. | Combination of Einstein's theory of relativity and René Descartes' I think, therefore I am. | 3x22 |
There, before the flippers, go I. | There, before the grace of God, go I. | 4x10 |
Those who can - do, those who can't - do not. | Those who can - do, those who can't - criticise/teach. | 9x15 |
To be forewarned, is to have four arms. | Forewarned is forearmed. | 5x08 |
Use a condom, go to jail. | Use a condom, go to school. | 6x01 |
Non-Kelly Kellyisms
What Was Said | What Was Meant | Episode |
---|---|---|
You have nothing to fear, but fear strikes out | We have nothing to fear but fear itself | 5x17 (Franklin D. Roosevelt) |