Magnificent Seven is the Season 7 premiere episode of Married... with Children that aired on FOX on September 13, 1992, also the 132nd overall episode of the series. The episode, directed by Gerry Cohen, was written by Arthur Silver.
Synopsis[]
In this episode a new member of the Bundy clan is introduced. Peg's cousins (played by Linda Blair and Bobcat Goldthwait) visit and end up leaving behind their son, Seven (Shane Sweet), dumping him on the Bundys, of whom the only one who is pleased about it is Peg, who looks at it as another chance at mothering.
Short Summary[]
Seven's parents.
Buck displays a sign of protest for the lack of food.
The Bundys suddenly have another mouth to feed when Peggy's backwards cousin Zemus Wanker and his wife, Ida Mae, pay a quick visit and leave behind their five-year-old son Seven (who they named because he was their seventh kid, although when counting how many they had, they forgot the number six), who's captivating to Peggy (and only Peggy). She sees this as her chance to be a "great mother"... or at least another try.
The purpose of their visit is to leave behind their son with the Al and Peg; they manage to do it on the premise of "going out to get some cigarettes". Meanwhile, Al is desperate and he has to take a solo road trip to Georgia to try to track Seven's parents in a forlorn attempt to avoid having to support yet another family member. Al arrives back and seeing how Peggy and Seven are with each other, Al lies and says he couldn't find them, and they'll just have to raise him themselves.
Guest stars/Recurring cast[]
- Cast regulars
- Amanda Bearse as Marcy D'Arcy
- Ted McGinley as Jefferson D'Arcy
- Buck as Buck Bundy
Guest starring[]
Quotes[]
- Al: [looks around the living room] By the way, uh, where are the Kettles?
- Peg: Well, right after you left, they went out for cigarettes.
- Al: [alarmed, covers Seven's ears] And you let them go? That has to be the dumbest move in history! No, the second dumbest. The first dumbest had to be when I answered your phone call the day after we had sex. [panicking] Peg, you just let these people stick us with their kid! OH, MY GOD! I'VE GOT ANOTHER CHILD! [begins wailing]
- Al: Now, Marcy, don't take this as an insult, you parakeet in a flannel shirt. But speaking as a friend, your body shows no signs of womanhood; it's obvious to me you're barren. And even if by some miracle you actually laid an egg, and then hatched a child, and tried to breast-feed it, the kid would starve to death, because, well let's face it Marce, there can't be enough in there for a cup of coffee. [Marcy quickly looks down at her chest before looking up and trying to ignore Al's remark] So, uh, having said that - with love - from one friend to another, I offer you the son you'll never have. Let me go get his clothes.
- [Al starts to leave for the staircase, but Marcy quickly blocks him with her hands]
- Marcy: Oh, Al, I couldn't possibly accept anything from you. Instead, let me give you something... [angrily] TEN FINGERS OF DEATH! [grabs Al's neck and violently strangles him] I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU!
- [Jefferson runs over and pulls her off of Al while holding her back]
- Marcy: [hurt] ...And I have breasts, damn it!
- Jefferson: She really does Al. You just can't see them.
- [Al moves into Bud's room after Peg brought Seven to their bedroom and notices the adult magazines spread out on his bed]
- Al: [chuckling] Hey now! What's this?! [picks up one of the magazines and looks at the cover] "Hooters - Absolutely No Faces" Good-ish!
- Bud: [frustrated, tries to take the magazine] Come on, Dad!
- Al: [firmly] GO TO SLEEP!
- [A frustrated Bud turns over to his side while Al continues to giggle and skim through the magazine, before stopping and noticing something odd]
- Al: ...BUD, DID YOU DO THIS?! [Bud rolls over and pats the bed, before Al becomes depressed] Oh, God look at my life! I'm sitting in my own son's wet spot!
Notes[]
Title[]
- The title of this episode is a reference to the 1960 western film, The Magnificent Seven and the introduction of Seven.
Trivia[]
- This is the debut episode of Seven. He would appear in a total of 12 episodes during season 7, before eventually disappearing from the show without explanation.
- Some believe that the addition of Seven was the moment when the show "Jumped the Shark".
- Many of the complaints about the character noted that his character did not fit the show's more adult oriented humor and that he would have been better suited for a family friendly sitcom, as well as Shane Sweet being a terrible child actor.
- Bud's bedroom is shown for the first time and is located across from Al and Peggy's bedroom.
- Al reveals that he stays up extra late on Saturday nights and eats tacos so he can wake up alone and naked when Peggy gets up on Sunday morning.
- Peggy implies that Al suffers from premature ejaculation after Bud asks her if she warned Al about her relatives coming over.
- Zemus and Ida Mae were until recently nudists. It is also mentioned by the couple that they are swingers and are into swapping partners, regardless of gender.
- Bobcat Goldthwait, who plays Zemus Wanker, would later voice Mr. Floppy in the WB sitcom, Unhappily Ever After. The series was created by Ron Leavitt and Arthur Silver after they departed from the show at the end of season 7. It was also noted for sharing many similarities to MWC during its four year run.
- Bobcat Goldthwait becomes the third actor from the Police Academy movies to guest star on Married...with Children.
- The first was Bubba Smith in "All Night Security Dude" and later "Dud Bowl", and the second was Tim Kazurinsky in "God's Shoes".
- Kelly states that Bud is 19 years old in this episode.
- As seen below in the Goofs section of this page, it is next to impossible for Bud to age a year in 9 months. Then again, this is Kelly, Grade A moron.
- The image of "Wags the Perplexed Pup" would later be reused for the "Hooter Kit" that Bud gets as a Christmas gift in Al's dream in "Christmas".
Cultural References[]
- Peggy is shown bribing Bud and Kelly with M&M's, a hard shell chocolate candy.
- Al sarcastically refers to Zemus and Ida Mae as "The Kettles" when asking about their whereabouts, in reference to the fictional hillbilly couple Ma and Pa Kettle.
- Bud tells Seven about how he broke up with supermodel Cindy Crawford.
- After hanging the "Wags the Perplexed Pup" poster, Kelly suggests he put up a Blossom calendar, in reference to the NBC sitcom and its main character.
Music[]
- Bud and Kelly are forced to sing "Baby Face" by Al Jolson for Seven's amusement.
Locations[]
- Bundy Residence
- Paradise Trailer Park
Sets[]
- Bundy Living Room / Kitchen
- Bud's Bedroom
- Zemus and Ida Mae's Trailer
Goofs[]
- Depending on who you believe, Bud Bundy's birthday is either in 1973 or 1974. In "Rites of Passage," Bud clearly turns 18 as he attends the nudie bar for the first time. Actor David Faustino turned 18 around the time of the filming of "Teacher Pets." There is no supporting evidence to state that Bud is 19.
- When Al complains about his life and sitting in Bud's wet spot, as Al slams the magazine down, Bud is shown rolling up his pillow that he was already holding onto. The camera then switches angles to show Al getting and Bud is now starting to grab the pillow and then places it straight on his lap